


jesus christ hotline. sir, you are live.

by wonnietv (heoneybee)



Category: K-pop, Monsta X (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Catholic Private School Boys, Fluff and Humor, Hyungwon is everyone's baby, M/M, Religion isn't an issue here, kihyun is the host of the school's radio/hotline
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-24
Updated: 2019-02-24
Packaged: 2019-11-04 23:14:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,190
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17907536
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/heoneybee/pseuds/wonnietv
Summary: the one where kihyun is the host of the jesus christ hotline, minhyuk calls to say that jesus sucks, hyungwon doesn't lift a finger and jooheon calls to inquire about his friend's crush.





	jesus christ hotline. sir, you are live.

**Author's Note:**

  * For [ninanana](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ninanana/gifts).



> happy birthday nina <3 this is short and not all that great but it's the best i could do in this short time. i hope you like it and that it's a present that makes you happy

**** kihyun pulled his headphones back over his ears, welcomed the muffled white noise before a single soft beep that signalled the red light above his head turning green.

 

“jesus christ hotline. sir, you are live.” 

 

“yeah, hi, i’m calling in again to say that jesus suc—“ kihyun’s finger mercilessly presses the button to cut off minhyuk’s telephone voice and tries not to grit his teeth hard enough to make his head hurt again. only five people even listen to him, he tells himself. it does little to make his situation better when minhyuk has called all of twenty times that very day. 

 

across the table, sprawled out on the ratty couch in the tiny room that has become their studio is hyungwon. he blinks sleepy eyes at him, looking as disinterested as ever until he notices kihyun looking and forces a smile, followed by a sluggish thumbs up. hyungwon’s lost, doe eyes are cute as they stare him down so he doesn’t grit his teeth this time either. 

 

the telephone rings a second later and kihyun removes his finger from the button he has been holding pressed and moved to quickly click his forefinger over another one. 

“jesus christ hotline, you are live.” the pleasant timbre that’s his usual voice has thinned down due to annoyance because the school trusted him with this much and his friend is being an asshole and although hyungwon is getting all the extra credit he hasn’t actually moved a finger. 

 

“yeah, hi- uh.” kihyun hears some rustling and an exhale before the very quiet voice returns, only louder and brighter. “hi, so. i need help with something? i have this— this friend.” from the corner of his eye he can see hyungwon place the manhwa away from his lap and sit up slightly, evidently listening. “and— and he goes to our school,” the sweet voice laughs, nervous, “anyway, he has a crush on the host of this radio show and i just wanted to ask—“ kihyun hasn’t yet processed what’s being said when there’s a flurry of movements and a thud and he looks up to find hyungwon on the ground in front of the couch. “i wanted to ask if you’re seeing anyone.” the voice finally finishes. kihyun blinks and meets hyungwon’s eyes and blinks again. 

 

the voice at the other end of the line chuckles. kihyun doesn’t move as hyungwon sits back on his haunches and when he finally opens his mouth to reply, the soft choice chuckles, mumbles a soft ‘never mind’ and hangs up. 

 

kihyun starts gritting his teeth. 

 

his first assumption is that it’s a prank. hyungwon’s reaction has been slightly odd and while he doesn’t think the school’s unofficial sweetheart would be capable or even willing to prank him, he knows the same isn’t the case for minhyuk. except when he actually meets minhyuk later at lunch his parasite of a friend seems to be bursting with curiosity. 

 

“do you know who it could be? your secret admirer, i mean. does his voice sound familiar at all? do you think it’s a prank? i can imagine it being a prank.” minhyuk rattles off, bits and pieces of his sandwich flying out of his mouth while hyungwon loudly slurps his strawberry milk. 

 

“no, i don’t know who it could be.” kihyun replies. minhyuk doesn’t seem all that deterred but at least his mouth finally decides to stay closed. hyungwon has paused his slurping to steal a cherry tomato out of kihyun’s bento box. he lets him, of course. 

 

the bell is about to ring and kihyun knows very well the call will distract him from focusing on algebra class. he still thinks it’s a prank; there really is only a handful of listeners of their radio and kihyun isn’t exactly popular in his grade. or the grade below. or that one below that. 

being the head of the choir, the president of the senior class and the one to stand in front of the school’s gate in the morning and pick on everyone who wasn’t wearing their uniform properly has surely made his collage application look better, but it has also isolated him from his peers. he knows people would often ask hyungwon why he’s even friends with him, but the younger boy was amiable and no one can fault him for the friends he made. 

minhyuk no one would even dare ask. he might be a dreadful pest but he’s a dreadful pest who punched a guy for dropping all of kihyun’s books in a bucket of water. 

 

“don’t beat yourself up over it, i’m sure whoever it is will call again if they’re really interested.” hyungwon chirps and pushes another package of strawberry milk closer to kihyun. 

 

kihyun takes it, uses the straw to punch a hole through the tiny, round plastic covered opening and starts to slurp in unison with hyungwon. 

 

he doesn’t stop thinking about the call, but it slides to the back of his mind. there’s moments when he’s walking home from school that he’ll remember, when the sky is painted pink and minhyuk and hyungwon are holding hands next to him. or at random moments at home, when he’s supposed to be studying but spends half the time blinking at the treetop in his backyard through the window. 

 

it remains in his head and returns the following week when hyungwon is dozing off on the couch and kihyun clicks the button that allows the voice of whoever called them to project in their small radio show. 

 

“hello. jesus christ hotline, you are live.”

 

“uh.” the voice sounds familiar, but it’s only the nervous giggle that follows that makes it recognisable to kihyun. “hi, here’s the same guy from last week. still calling for his friend with the crush. and my friend keeps asking so… are you single?” now that the shrill pitch isn’t so prominent in his voice and every second breath doesn’t hit the microphone of his phone, kihyun thinks the voice sounds vaguely familiar. 

 

and it would make sense, too. their school wasn’t _that_ huge and whoever is calling must have at least been in kihyun’s proximity at one point, actual crush or not. 

“usually,” kihyun starts and licks his lips, “usually, i don’t like to share personal details about myself here, since this hotline is for helping others.” the small, exhaled ‘oh’, on the other end of the line sounds so disappointed that kihyun immediately continuous.

“but— but since you’re trying to help your friend, i guess i can make an exception and tell you. no, i’m not seeing anyone.” 

 

the line goes silent. hyungwon stirs and rubs his eyes before blinking them at kihyun in confusion. a tone signals that whoever had called has hung up. 

 

kihyun’s lips twitch into a lopsided grin.

“okay, moving on from this prank call—“

 

*

 

hyungwon is often described as passive and he supposes it’s true. his parents and teachers never had a problem with it; him being passive means that he’ll do as he’s told, never causing trouble. he thinks sometimes that’s why him and minhyuk are such a perfect pick, with how minhyuk restores the balance in his utterly monotone and passive universe. 

 

at least most of the time.

 

because for all his passiveness and quiet, sweet nature, hyungwon is fiercely protective over people he loves and cares for. one of those people being yoo kihyun. 

 

he’s often been questioned about their friendship and never even stopped to consider before defending his friend. kihyun and him have been neighbours since they were little and since the day hyungwon moved into the yellow house with the wooden fence, kihyun has been by his side, helping him and taking care of him. when asked about it, he’ll say that it was only natural; hyungwon is younger, he’s a grade below him and kihyun, being the single child that he is, probably yearned for the company and a sibling who would look up to him. 

 

hyungwon owes him a lot and while it’s not usually his thing to meddle in other people’s business, he makes it his job to meddle this time. 

 

so he’s only slightly nervous when he rounds in on lee jooheon before first class on a thursday morning. they have been classmates last year, but jooheon ended up in the class next to his this year and hyungwon has heard his voice often enough to recognise it. 

 

jooheon doesn’t seem to be aware of it; and why should he? they never really talked much with hyungwon being naturally quiet and jooheon having his own group of friends. 

 

“hi?” jooheon finally says, an awkward giggle and a dimpled smile following. he’s cute. kihyun likes cute. 

 

“i’m going to help you with your crush.” hyungwon tells him and grabs his arm before jooheon can run away. 

 

*

 

“jesus christ hotline, you—“

 

“it’s not a prank.” a rushed voice says. it takes kihyun a moment to place it and its meaning, but when he does his heart slowly ascend into his stomach. he adjusts his headphones with clammy hands. “i actually have a crush on you, it’s me. and it’s not a prank.” 

 

“okay…” kihyun says slowly, nods. then: “okay, so you’re calling so i would help you with your crush on me?” 

 

“no!” the voice on the other line says quickly. “no, i called to find out if you’re single and i did, but i didn’t want it to come across like i was pranking you. i didn’t want to make you feel bad, i’m sorry.” he speaks quickly, voice slightly nasal and words dragging to make his sulk audible. it makes something in his gut stir. the same something that stirs whenever he sees something cute that just demands to be cooed at. 

 

“it’s— it’s okay. no hard feelings.” kihyun replies. he looks up and sees hyungwon watching him, sleepy eyes alert and lips hidden beneath the sleeves of his sweater. he’s hiding something. “so, can i maybe ask for a name or—?” kihyun continues only to be met with the beeping tone of the call being quit on him again. 

 

*

 

“you’re hiding something.” kihyun establishes while hyungwon drags him towards the rooftop after class. he’s got long, delicate fingers very loosely pinching kihyun’s sleeve so freeing himself would be incredibly ease, but he didn’t want to ruin hyungwon’s scheme. 

 

“maybe.” hyungwon replies and gives him a smile. 

 

“are you dragging me to the rooftop because that’s where all the confessions happen in manhwas?”

 

“well, we don’t have any cherry blossom tree gardens.” hyungwon mumbles into his pout. kihyun sighs as he’s being urged through the door of the rooftop. it falls shut behind him, but not before he gets a thumbs up and whispered ‘good luck’ from hyungwon. 

 

the rooftop looks deserted and by far not as romantic as all those stories make it seem. there’s loose leaves lying around, some plastic wrappers and cigarette buds that people left behind. the autumn wind is also strong enough to make him freeze when it crawls up and along his spine. he already wants to turn around and leave when there’s a scuff of shoes and kihyun turns to meet the dimpled smile of a boy. his face is round; he’s all cheeks and plum raspberry lips, his eyes endearingly kind. 

“h-hi.” he stutters and kihyun recognises the same sweet tone he heard over the phone before. the sweetness over the phone didn’t compare to hearing it live.

 

“hi.” he returns just as awkward and shifts. “hyungwon dragged you here?” the boy nods and kicks the toes of his sneakers into the ground. 

 

“he recognised my voice and came to talk to me. he said you were really upset because you thought someone was pranking you and— and that he thinks there’s no loss in asking for a date, so…”

 

“that’s all he said?”

 

“that and you being immediately enamoured with everything that’s cute.” a chuckle left the boy’s lips, dripping like sweet honey. “he said that right after calling me cute.” he’s not wrong, kihyun thinks but doesn’t say anything. his cheeks feel oddly warm and he bites his lip. for a moment there’s only silence then kihyun holds out his hand and clears his throat. 

 

“i’m yoo kihyun, i’m a senior, my blood type is B and i’m currently single.” the other boy’s smile is shy, but quickly turns into a vibrant and unhinged laugh. his hand is warm and soft when it closes around kihyun’s.

 

“i’m lee jooheon. i’m in the same grade as hyungwon, my blood type is O and i’m also currently single.” he doesn’t pull his hand away yet and the warmth of his skin makes kihyun’s own fingertips tingle. “then, kihyun-ssi would you go on a date with me?”

 

*

 

kihyun straightens his shoulders and makes a point of ignoring his boyfriend currently being used as plush that the octopus baby that a sleeping hyungwon is. it’s not easy. he’s itching to take pictures. jooheon’s grin also doesn’t make it easier and definitely doesn’t make his ears burn any less. 

 

“jesus christ hotline, you are live.” 

 

“jesus christ suck—“

**Author's Note:**

> i also now have a separate fic [twt](https://twitter.com/wonnietv) just for spoilers and updates as well as a [curiouscat](https://curiouscat.me/wonnietv) for questions n prompts!


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